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“Your baby is actually not beautiful, sorry.”

Date: January 26, 2010 | Posted By:

Are you tired of your baby girl’s androgyny? Can’t wait for gender roles to really take a hold on your child and tell her what’s what? Well don’t worry, now you can do more than dress her in pink and hope for the best! With Baby Bangs, the hairpiece for baby girls, you can get a jump start on enforcing beauty norms and make sure your daughter knows from the youngest age that her femininity is tangled up in her hair.

I bet this baby is way happier now that shes got this empowering new hairpiece that differentiates her from the boys in her playgroup. Oh wait...

I bet this baby is way happier now that she's got this empowering new hairpiece that differentiates her from the boys in her playgroup. Oh wait...

I really want Baby Bangs to be satirical, like those cat wigs that took the internet by storm a few years ago, and who knows—maybe it is. The web site appears to be down (that, or they can sense my feminist rage from across the internet and have thrown up that “403: forbidden” message just for me), but I’m not letting myself get my hopes up. In a world where a woman’s sexiness is determined at least in part by the length, shine, and silkiness of her hair, I can totally see a product like this finding a dedicated audience.

This is disturbing because it literally turns these baby girls into playthings. It transforms a living, breathing person into a doll to play dress-up with. When you think about it, the foreshadowing is absolutely epic: a girl raised on fake hair seamlessly gives way to a teenager obsessed with her makeup seamlessly gives way to a woman who can’t feel comfortable in her own body because she has never once had the chance to really own it. Her beauty has always been in the hands of somebody else. Even as a baby her natural state needed improvement. Are these really the messages we want to be sending our daughters?

A child is not an accessory, so let’s please stop treating her like she is.

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Melissa is About-Face’s newest blog editor. She likes sass, feminism, and tattoos, and gets weirded out by dogs in sweaters.




What Do You Think?

2 Responses to “Your baby is actually not beautiful, sorry.”

  1. The Round-Up: Jan. 26/10 « Gender Focus on 01-26-2010

    [...] About-Face covers new product: “baby bangs” that helps you make your bald girl baby look less androgynous. Seriously. [...]
  2. Salt Lake City Dentist on 02-04-2010

    For me all babies are adorable.They are angels from heaven.With that Baby Bangs, as soon as my friend's baby girl turns two I'll buy her baby wigs.