Comments on: Mommy vs. media in sexualization of girls: Where are the dads? http://www.about-face.org/mommy-vs-media-in-sexualization-of-girls-where-are-the-dads/ Wed, 05 Jun 2013 08:05:52 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.4.1 By: Amanda B. http://www.about-face.org/mommy-vs-media-in-sexualization-of-girls-where-are-the-dads/#comment-28857 Amanda B. Thu, 06 Sep 2012 10:22:25 +0000 http://www.about-face.org/?p=10935#comment-28857 Late to the party, but wanted to chip in: I think in addition to directly talking with and counseling his daughter, a father can dramatically impact her through the way he treats his wife. Does Dad view Mom as an object, only commenting on her looks? Or does he openly affirm her intelligence, value, and abilities? Does he care more about what she looks like or about who she is? Does he demonstrate attraction and affection towards her on her scruffy days, or only when she's done herself up in makeup? Does he speak well about his wife to his daughter? All of those actions, in my opinion, send a strong message to the daughter about how she should expect to be treated and valued--by her future husband or boyfriend, yes, but also by society as a whole. I think it is powerful to have male involvement in that message, to give an early counter to the argument which claims this is "the way that men are". A father getting involved demonstrates this to be an issue of right vs. wrong, rather than male vs. female. The more solidarity both parents show on the issue, the better. Late to the party, but wanted to chip in: I think in addition to directly talking with and counseling his daughter, a father can dramatically impact her through the way he treats his wife. Does Dad view Mom as an object, only commenting on her looks? Or does he openly affirm her intelligence, value, and abilities? Does he care more about what she looks like or about who she is? Does he demonstrate attraction and affection towards her on her scruffy days, or only when she’s done herself up in makeup? Does he speak well about his wife to his daughter?

All of those actions, in my opinion, send a strong message to the daughter about how she should expect to be treated and valued–by her future husband or boyfriend, yes, but also by society as a whole. I think it is powerful to have male involvement in that message, to give an early counter to the argument which claims this is “the way that men are”. A father getting involved demonstrates this to be an issue of right vs. wrong, rather than male vs. female. The more solidarity both parents show on the issue, the better.

]]> By: Wordphreak http://www.about-face.org/mommy-vs-media-in-sexualization-of-girls-where-are-the-dads/#comment-27099 Wordphreak Wed, 29 Aug 2012 19:17:47 +0000 http://www.about-face.org/?p=10935#comment-27099 I love the accompanying "father" photo, where the girl child is working in service of Dad. Doesn't that reinforce the girl's view of her place in the world? I love the accompanying “father” photo, where the girl child is working in service of Dad. Doesn’t that reinforce the girl’s view of her place in the world?

]]> By: Marjorie http://www.about-face.org/mommy-vs-media-in-sexualization-of-girls-where-are-the-dads/#comment-23768 Marjorie Fri, 10 Aug 2012 19:16:59 +0000 http://www.about-face.org/?p=10935#comment-23768 My Mom and Dad were both very involved parents. My mother especially concerned herself with teaching me and my 2 sisters (and the 5 brothers too!) appropriate dress conduct and we were not allowed to purchase or wear anything that was inappropriate or sexual in nature. We learned which undergarments were to be worn under dresses and skirts and blouses. It seems mothers don't teach their girls that any more. I for one, with a 7 year old daughter, am very aware of the affect media has on little girls and boys. They soak everything up in their little brains and I refuse to fall into the trap of allowing TV to dictate appropriate behavior for my girl. My husband and I are very up front about what is inappropriate and appropriate for her to watch, read, eat, hear, do, wear and see. No ifs, ands or buts. It is our job to shape her and help her become a strong, independent woman who carries herself in a respectable manner and respects her body and mind and doesn't allow others to treat her without the same level she deserves. I love About Face and your efforts to get the message out! My Mom and Dad were both very involved parents. My mother especially concerned herself with teaching me and my 2 sisters (and the 5 brothers too!) appropriate dress conduct and we were not allowed to purchase or wear anything that was inappropriate or sexual in nature. We learned which undergarments were to be worn under dresses and skirts and blouses. It seems mothers don’t teach their girls that any more. I for one, with a 7 year old daughter, am very aware of the affect media has on little girls and boys. They soak everything up in their little brains and I refuse to fall into the trap of allowing TV to dictate appropriate behavior for my girl. My husband and I are very up front about what is inappropriate and appropriate for her to watch, read, eat, hear, do, wear and see. No ifs, ands or buts. It is our job to shape her and help her become a strong, independent woman who carries herself in a respectable manner and respects her body and mind and doesn’t allow others to treat her without the same level she deserves. I love About Face and your efforts to get the message out!

]]> By: Cathy S http://www.about-face.org/mommy-vs-media-in-sexualization-of-girls-where-are-the-dads/#comment-23753 Cathy S Fri, 10 Aug 2012 17:55:37 +0000 http://www.about-face.org/?p=10935#comment-23753 Absolutely spot on. As a mother AND father our girls look up to us as their first heros and sheros. It is ultimately our responsibility to be our kid's role model. There is no cable in my home. The only thing we watch are movies and preselected videos series of programs I have approved of first. I wouldn't want my daughter to flip through the channels and see Toddlers and Tiaras and think this is normal behavior. I spent so much time watching all the nonsense on tv that when I turned it off I went into reality tv withdrawal. Luckily it only lasted a couple of weeks and it has been so refreshing being free of that drama. Great article and thank you for getting the message out! C Absolutely spot on. As a mother AND father our girls look up to us as their first heros and sheros. It is ultimately our responsibility to be our kid’s role model. There is no cable in my home. The only thing we watch are movies and preselected videos series of programs I have approved of first. I wouldn’t want my daughter to flip through the channels and see Toddlers and Tiaras and think this is normal behavior.

I spent so much time watching all the nonsense on tv that when I turned it off I went into reality tv withdrawal. Luckily it only lasted a couple of weeks and it has been so refreshing being free of that drama.

Great article and thank you for getting the message out!
C

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